The Actual Last Post

Ok. I won't blame it on the LA Fitness murderer, that was a lie.

But...

I really am done with this blog.

I have closure.
It was a success on many levels:
[in no particular order]

1. It gave me an outlet to express my amusement with scapegoating people using the economy as an excuse for their lack of performance, laziness, perpetual victimization paradigm, and self-absorbed greed.
2. I'm #1 on google (as of this moment) if you search "blame the economy".
Here's a genuine screen shot:

Note: I even beat that viral Jamie Foxx spoof-video "Blame it on the Economy".
3. I had copycats, namely Christopher Ross who runs the .ORG version of this domain.
This, I am told, is the highest form of flattery.
4. It gave all of my readers, friends and family a fun catchphrase. You know it's fun to say "Blame the Economy". Face it. My pastor the other day said that "Blame the Economy" is the new "No thank you". That feels good. To be the first person who noticed the blaming-trend that this country was following and jump on the .COM. I really enjoyed the spread of this new catchphrase, of which I had a hand in. It made me smile when people said things like "Hey, I was going to give you a birthday gift, but... Blame the Economy."
6. I had 50 posts. I don't regret any of them. Some were better than others. But a lot of amateur blogs go years without that benchmark.
7. I never sold out. I never used google ads or any other pay-per-click advertising which not only clutters websites and bothers the eyes, it cheapens the content.
8. I made fun of the government. Boom. Roasted.
9. You got involved. You, my dear readers sent me a truckload of photos and suggestions. I didn't even get to them all. But it's incredibly honoring that you take the time to send them to me and that you want to participate.
10. It helped me get behind the eyes of people who are always looking for something or someone else to blame for their problems. While searching for content, I had to change my perspective. If I saw something crappy, I had to imagine how the economy was to blame for why it was crappy. I honestly still don't get why people live their lives in perpetual-victimhood. It's exhausting and severely binding.

Those are at least some of the reasons I'm calling it a success.

I'm calling it quits mainly because I'm bored with it.
There's infinite things one could do when they sit at their computer and being depressed about the economy shouldn't be at the top of your list. It was fun for a while, but I made my point. The Economy is not that bad. Don't get me wrong, it's bad. But it's hardly the second Great Depression the campaigning Obama made it out to be. There aren't families living in boxes everywhere. There aren't abandoned cars lining our curbs with the doors hanging off. 65% of unemployed people have cell phones (see study). The poorest of the poor in America will never be as bad off as the "least of these" I met in Thailand. The people with mortgage trouble here have a pool and at least one extra bathroom, and they're blaming the economy for their hardship instead of looking in the mirror and accepting that they were the ones that bought more than they needed and were unprepared for the worst. People bought homes with the greedy idea that the housing bubble would never pop and they could gain a quick buck in equity, then when it tanked and their balloon payment kicked in, they complain. People say there aren't jobs, but I honestly see at least one "now hiring" sign every single day. There are jobs. But you might have to push a broom, cook food, fold clothes or do something else that is "beneath you." The economy sucks, but continually putting yourself under its feet instead of figuring out how to adapt, change and grow is the epitome of mediocrity. Let me just say that if everyone had everything they wanted and lacked nothing, no one would be happy. Make do. Suck it up. When you finally stop blaming others and events for your lot in life and move on, you will truly succeed. When life gives you lemons, paint that crap gold.

_Over

Final Post on Blame the Economy?

George Sodini, the Pittsburgh maniac who killed young women in an aerobics class at an LA Fitness wrote this on his website on April 24th, 2009:

"I know this firm is using this downturn as an excuse to take advanage of a bad situation and kill jobs UNNECESSARILY. The second layoff people who actually did work were let go. We all need to pick up the slack so the company can cut beyond what is necesary. Wasn't going to mention it, because of all this shit, it is K&L Gates, the large law firm headquartered here in Pittsburgh."

He also made reference on July 20th, 2009 to "this shitty Obama ecomomy"

Huh.
Obviously, the whole point of BLAME THE ECONOMY .COM is to point out how stupid it is that people blame everything on the Economy.
Kind of like when people say, "The Devil made me do it". Lame scapegoating.

I really don't like having anything in common with murderers. Even if it is simply blogging about the Economy.

Maybe I should shut this sucker down...

I mean, I realize it's different.
But still.
Yuck.

This may be the last post.

---End of Line.

Updates on the Economy

This fuzzy, low grade picture was captured at the ATM where I bank.
If you don't want to read all of that fuzzy fine print, all you need to know is that CALIFORNIA IS BROKE. Blame the Economy.

Speaking of California...


The LA times notes that as the Economy worsened, so did the Governator's poll numbers: Read more.

"Aaron McLear, Schwarzenegger’s spokesman, said governors in other states have suffered big drops in the polls because of the economy. Only one -- David Paterson of New York, also at 28% -- had a rating as low as Schwarzenegger. Paterson has had numerous political problems since taking over after Eliot Spitzer quit in a prostitution scandal."

McLear said Schwarzenegger remains “focused on jobs and turning our economy around.”"

Choose your own caption:

"Beer Summit"
"Ale to the Chief"
"The Suds that Soothed"
"BeerGate"
"Beer: Easier than an Apology"
"Mugged Prof. Shares a Mug with Mugger"
"Alcohol: The Cure for Angry Racism"
"White House Kegger"
"Beer Bottle Diplomacy"
"Stay Thirsty, My Constituants"
"Let Them Drink Beer"
"Washing Down Racism with a Cold One"
"I Hope Brewski it My Way"
"Longneck Politics"
"Just Plain Awkward"
"Booze We Can Believe In"

Whatever caption you choose, the real story here is about Joe Biden. The Economy is so bad, the White House couldn't afford to get him a real beer. He drank Buckler, a nonalcoholic beer. There are some that suggest he wasn't drinking because he was the only one there who didn't dirty his hands in GatesGate. Absurd. The real reason is that it was the Economy's fault. Let's hope next time someone "acts stupidly", the Economy is good enough that Biden can enjoy a real beer.

Moving on, the Swine Flu [that's right. I just beligerantly called it Swine and not H1N1] is going to be even harder to deal with because of the Economy.

The Economy resulted in budget cuts to health services and hospitals, so basically we're screwed.
Reuters reports:
"For a pandemic to come in this economy is enormously challenging," Dr. Thomas Frieden, director of the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, said at the National Association of County and City Health Officials annual conference. "If we could have chosen a different time for the H1N1 to come, we would have."

For those of you who have lost your home, car, and life as you know it due the Economy, looks like you can no longert say "At least I have my health". The Economy ruined that too, as evidenced by hospital visits increasing as the Economy worsens. Read more.

If that bums you out, you might find solace in the fact that market forces may soon drive down the cost of Cuban cigars:

Obama recently eased Cuban travel restrictions. Read More.
Big mistake.
This caused the Economic Crisis to spead to Cuba like ants on sugar.
Way to go, Barack.

The Associate Press Reports:
"Cuba clicked into crisis mode Friday, postponing a key Communist Party congress aimed at charting a post-Castro future and announcing that its woeful economy is even worse than expected.

Cubans will have to make do with less, top communists suggested, as they insisted the armed forces are strong enough to deal with any unrest.

The island's top two political bodies — the Council of Ministers and the Communist Party's Central Committee — huddled in secret on how to guide Cuba through what President Raul Castro was quoted as calling a "very serious" crisis."

Lot's of heavy stuff here, folks.
Blame the Economy.

Political Catfights. Blame the Economy.

Above: Minority leader John Boehner (for those of you in Avondale, it's pronounced "bay-ner", you perverts!) mocks Rhambo on the House floor.

You see, Boehner is one of our readers. In fact, he's true believer in this blog and everything we say. He knows the Economy is, in fact, not fixed/better/improved/good/swell/pixie-dusted-fun/okay/corrected/rehabilitated/recuperated or revamped. He knows it's curtains for the modern world. His effort on the floor today was an exercise to help me Chronicle our Demise, not because it's going to make a lick of difference in what happens in Washington. Politics is the new celebrity gossip; so soak it up, Dear Readers!

Moving on.

Below is a picture I took on my way to...
*ahem*
...work this morning.
I know. I know. I really should quit working and just default on my mortgage and collect a butt-load of stimulus dollars, I'll get around to it sooner or later.

Anyways, I took a friggen picture.
So look at it already.



Thank you.
Sorry for the quality, best I could do at high speeds through my windshield.
As you probably noticed, unless you need glasses and can't afford them due to the Economy (of course if that were the case, you couldn't read this either... I could be mocking you right now and you wouldn't know. Mock! Mock! Mock! Mock! Heh heh heh! Choke on that, blindy!), is a cop car on a tow truck.

I tried to flag the driver and ask what the deal was, but he recognized the Blamemobile and didn't want his face posted on this blog and so refused to comment and drove off.
From what I could tell, the squad car was undamaged by any sort of accident.
Which leaves us with two options:
It's wrapped in disrepair because Arizona can't afford to fix it.
OR
The Economy's Repo Minons are at it again, collecting a five-o that the state has reglected it's payments on.
Either way, our state is broke.
Blame the Economy.

The Chronicles of Our Demise

Matthew McConaughey is the male Scarlet Johansson; Men love to hate him and women love to love him. On the silver screen, Matthew is known for typically playing a "suave" walking venereal disease with money and a cool job, irresistible to women. Off screen, he's known for the exact same thing, minus the "suave" part. As far as I am concerned, "Reign of Fire" is the only movie that he isn't completely intolerable in.
So there!
Wait a minute...
Why the heck did I bring this up?
Sorry. Give me a second here...

Matthew McConaughey... Walking VD... Silver Screen... intolerable...

Oh yeah! "Reign of Fire."

So anyways, "Reign of Fire". Great Movie.
Basically, dragons take over the whole earth, leaving a very small population of humans pitted against the odds and in a post-apocalyptic thrill-ride spearheaded by Matthew McConaughey and Christian Bale.
Typical disaster/end times flick.
As you probably know, a staple for a movie of this genre is the flashback scene in which various news clippings and articles fade on and off screen in epic and dramatic fashion.
The reason for this is to show how the movie got from the brief opening scene from the past to the more exciting post-apocalyptic setting during which the majority of the movie takes place.
It's designed to fill you in without trying too hard to develop a plot. Plots get in the way of explosions and gunfire.
Yeah, so, in "Reign of Fire", there's a conglomerate of Time magazine covers of dragons burning all major landmarks and Wonders of the World.
They call these types of scenes the "Chronicles of Demise".

Why do I bring all of this up?
Well, unbeknownst to you, you've been viewing the Chronicles of our Demise right here. On this blog. I expect full royalties when future films are made about the Economy and photos from this site are used in the obligatory-flashback/Chronicles of Demise scenes.

These are the end times. The world will never come back from a Recession of this magnitude.
Ready yourself. Soon, you'll be hiding away in a hillside fortress like the one in "Reign of Fire", except the beast you'll be hiding from is far more frightening than any dragon.
More fierce than the hounds of hell.
More bloodthirsty than all serial killers combined.
Carries more hate than Jen has for Angelina.
Merciless. Evil. Vile.
The Destroyer.


The Economy.

With that said,
here's another photo to add to the Chronicles of Our Demise:


Yes.
That really is the Dept. of Economic Security.
And yes. That is a "For Lease" sign.
Sorry for the quality of this photo.
If you want to see it for yourself, travel down to 47th Avenue and Indian School Road.

The end is very very nigh.
Blame the Economy.

EXCLUSIVE! Music Industry Bailout Efforts!

Rather than following news, we're once again breaking it.
CNN doesn't have this story.
FOX doesn't.
MSNBC doesn't.
ABC? Nope.
BlameTheEconomy.ORG definitely doesn't have it.
Eat your hearts out. All of you! You second rate media sources, you!

That's right. The following content is exclusive to BlameTheEconomy.COM
Please enjoy.

The music industry has asked for a bailout. Blame the Economy.
Their method for asking for the money?
Listen to it for yourself:

See why they need a bailout? Maybe they should ask for better writers, producers and artists instead of money.

- - -

Sorry, I know that the .mp3 player in this post is total crap. I can't afford to buy better code, Blame The Economy. If it's giving you trouble, go here: http://bigheadmaples.com/Economics.mp3

Or just right click on the above link and "save as".

Dollar becomes scarce. Blame the Economy.

Pictured above is a car wash machine that only accepts exact change. Annoying. This used to be a rare inconvenience, but expect to encounter it a lot more. The dollar is becoming more scarce.

Why?
Well, there are a few theories.

Theories ranging from:
Militant Eco/Green groups trying to hide as much paper money as possible to force everyone into using coins and plastic to prevent rain forests from being chopped down.
To:
The Chinese government has been using Panda Express restaurants to launder money and recoup some of the debt that the US owes China.

In reality, however, the Economy ate the money. It's gone.

The good news, however, is that all of the money will be coming back soon.
You see, the Economy, like any other beast, will eventually eat itself sick.
While at the moment it's swallowing paper money by the bankload, soon it will overfill its stomach; it'll get a bloated belly, a stomach ache and then it will regurgitate all that was lost back into the market. At this point, the Economy will be sick of our money. Uninterested in eating any more of it (kinda like the way my sister got sick and barfed up red Jell-O one time and never wanted to eat it again)

Then you'll have plenty of paper money. You see, the money (before the Economy pukes is back up), multiplies in the depths of the Economys stomach. The Economy might just yack up twice as much money as it ate. When this happens, you will probably never see the above picture in real life for generations to come.
Why is that?
Glad you asked.
Because once the Economy ralphs back up the cash, machines will not run out of cash for change.
You will never run out of cash. Ever.
The problem is, the money won't be worth anything. You'll be wiping your sphincter with a $5.00 bill because that will be cheaper than toilet paper. Don't believe me? Wait and see what happens. When I'm proven right and you're bartering your first born child for a gallon of gas, you can sit back and say, "Man that crazy guy was right. Oh well. Blame the Economy."

- - - - - - -

Big thanks to Jennifer in NoPho for this picture.

Drowning Kids? Blame the Economy.

sub- par photo by Mark Henle/The Arizona Republic

That's right.
The Economy is drowning children. Almost literally.
According to a report today by the financially-troubled Arizona Republic, child drownings are up.
Why?
Because of the Economy.
Seriously.
In an article entitled "Economy may hinder anti-drowning efforts", we are informed that because times are tough, parents aren't ponying up the dough to fence their pool. In addition, they're pacing the house freaking out about their 201-K and not noticing little Timmy's lungs filling with water. Subsequently, kids are drowning.

To quote AZCentral.com:
"While it's difficult to pin down what is causing the numbers to plateau or increase, [Tiffaney] Isaacson [water-safety coordinator for Phoenix Children's Hospital] suggested the economic downturn might play a role in hindering progress.

'Declining enrollment in swimming and CPR classes, expensive pool fences that never get built and stressed-out parents who lose track of their children can all increase the potential for danger', Isaacson said."

Well. Depressing, eh?

You may be asking, "How can we save the children?"

That, absolutely, is the wrong question.

You should be asking, "How can we make this a political issue and take a hyperpartisan stance?"


The AZ Republic offered this:

If your home does not have a pool fence, you may be eligible to receive a donated fence through the Adopt-a-Pool-Fence program. Families with young children in need of financial assistance are encouraged to apply. Families must meet the following criteria:

• A child 6 years or younger must be living in the home.

• The home must be owner-occupied.

• Families must demonstrate financial need.

• Families must reside in Maricopa County.

- - - - - - - - - - - -

The solution you just read was what, exactly?

Yes.

Bailouts for underprivileged families who have pools.
Hmmmh.
How underprivileged are you if you have a pool?

The average pool costs $1200 - $1500 a year to operate. So... maybe if you have an extra $1200 of disposable income laying around ((to keep a giant tub of happy-fun-fun water for you to enjoy during leisure time when you're not busy collecting welfare checks)), but you don't have enough to keep your kids safe...

THEN MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T OWN A FRIGGEN POOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Must demonstrate financial need?"

That must be hard to do while floating on a raft in your very own PRIVATE SWIMMING POOL!

Give me a freaking break.
You can't afford the fence?
Fine.
Then call a landscaping contractor who's down on his luck and offer him $40 bucks to drain your pool since you clearly shouldn't have one.
Then take that $1200-$1500 you save each year by not having a pool and make your mortgage payment on time for once so that the rest of us who do can stop supporting your POOLSIDE RELAXING, SUNTANNING, SUMMER DOG DAY ESCAPING, HANDOUT GRABBING, BACKYARD GETAWAY-ING KEISTER!

...But, I guess right now is the perfect time to let your kids drown and escape culpability by simply saying, "Blame the Economy".

xxxx

UPDATE:

Got a second-hand copy of the newspaper and simply had to include this picture:

Those idea-starved journalists at the Financially Troubled Arizona Republic are clearly stealing title ideas from this site. Once again, often imitated and never duplicated - BLAMETHEECONOMY.COM

...and the winner is

No one.
Nobody wins.
Thereby, everyone loses.

I didn't get a single, solitary entry.

You failed. As a person. You lost.

It was simple; Use your camera or camera phone to snap pictures of businesses displaying "hiring" signs and email them to me. The person who sent me the most pictures would have won a $15 dollar iTunes or Starbucks giftcard.

Just yesterday I upped the ante to $50.

Free. Money.

Free Money in THIS Economy.

Nobody took the time (and there was ample time [from May 18th until July 1st]) to email me. Not one person participated.

And it isn't because people don't read this blog. After all, you're reading it right now, aren't you? Look at how many people voted on that last Poll.

To say that there aren't enough readers would be an absurd estimation for a blog of this caliber.

It's ACTUALLY because you could not have emailed me any pictures if you wanted to.
Why?
There aren't any businesses displaying hiring signs.
There aren't any businesses displaying said signs because
there aren't any businesses hiring.
There aren't any businesses hiring because.... [think hard now] ...the Economy is so bad.

Essentially, you lost this contest because the Economy stole it from you.
You are a victim.
It isn't your fault.
Your free money has been stolen from you.
You could have had a nice Music or Coffee Stimulus package with no strings attached by simply sending off an email.
Instead, you have nothing.
To have nothing is to have despair.
Welcome to hell.
Blame the Economy.

Gift Card Winner TBA Tomorrow!

After much tallying and counting...

I will be announcing the winner of the first-ever-oh-so-fantastic-super-exciting-and-utterly-amazing "Blame the Economy Contest" TOMORROW!

Remember? The person who sent me the most pictures (by July 1st) of "Now Hiring" signs would win the $15 gift card?

I'm done counting and tomorrow I will be announcing the winner.

And here's the kicker...

THE PRIZE HAS BEEN UPPED TO FIFTY DOLLARS IN iTUNES MONEY!

That's right.

FIFTY not FIFTEEN.

Check BlameTheEconomy.COM tomorrow (after 5pm AZ) time to see who won the Music Stimulus Plan. It might be you!